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Low Self-esteem

We all sometimes feel insecure and unconfident. We may feel like all the other people are somehow better and that we are intrinsically bad. Low self-esteem is often an essential aspect of numerous psychological issues such as anxiety or depression. It’s a common symptom that can appear in various contexts, and no one is immune to it.


Low self-esteem is synonymous with lack of self-confidence. These expressions describe the feelings of low self-worth associated with shame and guilt. We feel ashamed for some of the bad things we did in the past. But very often, we’re too harsh with, and unreasonably undervalue, ourselves.


Self-esteem treatment helps you interpret and understand low self-esteem and find practical solutions across various situations – for example, by becoming more assertive with your managers and family. Self-esteem therapies like CBT effect a broad behavioural change, in a relatively short time, by helping you tackle unhelpful beliefs and coping related to low self-worth.

Woman on couch looking away

What is Self-Esteem?

Self-esteem is a psychological state reflecting satisfaction and happiness with yourself. It provides a foundation for a stable, productive life. However, success doesn't guarantee solid self-confidence - many successful people, including celebrities, struggle with low self-esteem. While excessive self-esteem can manifest as narcissism, this article focuses on low self-confidence and its impacts.


What are the Signs and Symptoms of Lack of Self-Confidence?

Low self-esteem often manifests as:

  • Obsessive thoughts about lack of worth

  • Intense guilt about minor mistakes

  • Feeling ashamed of yourself

  • Overcriticising yourself

  • Preoccupation with others' opinions

  • Negative self-image

These often appear as intrusive thoughts that persist. You might fixate on minor work mistakes while trying to sleep, or misinterpret social situations. Minor setbacks like missing dates or facing rejection can feel overwhelming.


Lack of Self-Confidence and Anxiety

Anxiety disorders often correlate with harsh self-judgment. GAD sufferers might view themselves as inferior due to their diagnosis. OCD patients may experience intrusive thoughts about embarrassing memories. While Panic Disorder centers on loss of control rather than low self-esteem, these feelings often intersect. Social anxiety frequently combines negative self-image with intense concern about others' opinions.


Low Self-Esteem and Narcissism

Narcissism has two faces: grandiose and vulnerable. Narcissists often struggle with worthlessness, compensating through arrogance, envy, and lack of empathy.


Low Self-Esteem and Depression

While worthlessness is one of depression's nine main symptoms, having low self-esteem doesn't automatically indicate depression. However, they can form a vicious cycle - cognitive issues from depression may worsen self-esteem, which further impacts cognitive function.


How is Low Self-Esteem Maintained?

Low self-confidence creates a self-fulfilling cycle. It depletes energy and motivation, preventing you from recognizing your worth. CBT focuses on breaking this cycle by challenging initial negative hypotheses.


What Causes Lack of Self-Confidence?

Main causes include:


Early development

Dysfunctional family environments often lead to low self-esteem due to lack of care, acceptance, and validation. These experiences can be reinterpreted through therapy.


Subsequent life events and environment

Life changes and developmental stages can impact self-esteem. Adolescence, career challenges, and aging can all trigger insecurity.


Biological underpinnings

Genetic factors influence self-esteem development. Neuroticism, partially determined by genetics, predisposes individuals to psychological issues including low self-worth. (https://www.cambridge.org/core/journals/development-and-psychopathology/article/abs/emotional-insecurity-as-a-mediator-of-the-moderating-role-of-dopamine-genes-in-the-association-between-interparental-conflict-and-youth-externalizing-problems/31A4EDA6AF0A14038F9F856E81C0D0D4)


When Should I Get Counselling for Low Self-Esteem?

Seek professional help when harsh self-generalizations about your worth affect your ability to enjoy work, relationships, and leisure activities.


Does Therapy Work for Lack of Self-Confidence?

Various treatment approaches exist, with CBT having the strongest research support. Expert Therapy combines multiple approaches including CBT, mindfulness-based therapies, psychodynamic therapy, and person-centered therapy.


What's the Best Therapy Approach for Dealing with Low Self-Esteem?

CBT is the NHS-recommended primary treatment (https://www.nhs.uk/mental-health/talking-therapies-medicine-treatments/talking-therapies-and-counselling/cognitive-behavioural-therapy-cbt/overview/). It helps challenge negative self-beliefs through cognitive restructuring and addresses specific contexts like workplace confidence through assertiveness training.


What are the Benefits of Low Self-Esteem Counselling?

Benefits include:

  • Inner peace

  • Reduced obsessive thoughts

  • Greater emotional stability

  • Increased motivation

  • Better relationships

  • More objective self-assessment

  • Improved career prospects

  • Reduced anxiety and low mood


How Long does Treatment for Low-Self Esteem Last?

Typically, 14 sessions suffice, with improvements possible after 6-7 sessions. Treatment length increases when low self-worth accompanies other psychological issues. (https://www.nhs.uk/mental-health/talking-therapies-medicine-treatments/talking-therapies-and-counselling/counselling/)


Does Online Therapy work for Lack of Self-Confidence?

Evidence shows online therapy, particularly CBT, effectively treats psychological issues including low self-worth. (https://www.tandfonline.com/doi/abs/10.1080/14733145.2012.733715)


Tips to get you Started Managing Low Self-Esteem

Self-help strategies include:

  • Listing your skills and abilities

  • Keeping a positive daily diary

  • Recording others' positive perceptions of you

  • Maintaining healthy lifestyle habits

  • Taking on challenges

Remember these tips complement but don't replace therapy. If you're looking for help with something you're struggling with, book your in-depth assessment now.


Expert Therapy - take the guesswork out of finding the right therapist.



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